February
2014
19 years, 7 months and 19 days – A Guardian Angel Now23
I have been blessed for so long with my handsome man that on February 26, 2014 I found it was best for Bailey to join all our other loved ones in heaven. Bailey could not walk more than a few steps on his own without falling down. His little beautiful body failed him. I believe his arthritis in his back was too much to bear. We sat outside in the sun all day together. He just slept on my lap for hours. Our wonderful vet let us sit outside with Bailey while he fell asleep. Our vet shed tears with us, completely unexpected but understood. Bailey has been his patient for about 15 years.
My heart is broken. Bailey has slept next to me every night of his 19 years, 7 months and 19 days, other than when I was out of town and he could not travel with me. He was a true best friend. Tonight my daughter took his place in bed with me as we shared some tears. He is now her guardian angel watching over her. She envisions him with wings in heaven running and jumping through the clouds eating chocolate. She never met my grandmother, but we talk often about her, and she tells me that he is now with her. Bailey came home with me fitting in the palm of my hand and he went to heaven with his family by his side. He never failed to be by my side when I was sad. I talked to him almost nightly about my day. He always offered kisses and licked my tears. As he was falling asleep he gave everyone kisses and drifted off. I wish he went on his own, I hate that I had to make that decision, but his last kisses I will take as a sign that he was thanking me for helping him.
Bailey had his amputation the end of March 2012 after his femur broke. It was believed to be osteocarcoma, but returned as hemangiocarcoma. He was given up to 9 months if he received 5 treatments of chemotherapy – we did two determining it was too much on his body. He lived 1 month shy of 2 years following his amputation. If you are reading this blog and weighing what to do right now with your dog (or cat), amputation gave my 17 year old dog 2 more years despite what the doctors said. He adjusted quickly to life on 3 legs after living 17 years on 4. Don’t let the fear of how your dog will do hold you back…think of Bailey and that he did it gracefully at 17. I learned from him that when something changes you change with it. He got up on Day 2 post-surgery and walked outside our doggie door manuevering as if he was already adjusted to life on three legs. Being different is a human concern not a doggie one. He didn’t worry about what other dogs thought, he was just happy to be with his family.
A friend passed this on to me when Bailey first had his amputation and I pass it on again to everyone (it is already posted on my blog pages):
I may be a little different, but my heart still beats the same.
I feel no pity for myself. I feel no regret or shame.
You help me do the little things, that most can do their own.
You filled the need of my broken soul, and love is all you’ve shown.
I wouldn’t be here without you, I wouldn’t make it without you here.
I’ve been with you when you’ve had enough, I’ve kissed away your tears.
I love that you never give up on me, you won’t let me give up on myself.
Even if I had one wish tomorrow, I’d never change the hand I was dealt.
You rescued me, gave me my name, and you always say it with love.
You pet me head, you kiss my face, and give me hugs.
I’ve got nothing to give you, but you take me as I am.
You cheer me on daily, you’re my biggest fan.
You take me on our outings, I ride right next to you.
You always make sure that I’m happy, and we have fun things to do.
Many people look at us, you pretend that you don’t mind.
They ask you “why you didn’t put him down?” You said “because treasure’s hard to find.”
Run free little buddy, run free…..
Where’s my present
A sleeping boy
My handsome man
My babies
The best kiss
Bailey resting with stuffed animals
My heart is breaking for you right now!
Bailey is now free from pain and running towards the rainbow bridge.
Many hugs and prayers for you and your family,
Linda and Tucker
Thank you so much for your thoughts. The thought of him not having pain and running is awe-inspiring. He loved jogging with me when we were both younger, but the thing he enjoyed the most was just standing outside and taking in the weather, whether it be sunny, rainy or cold. If I couldn’t find him in the house I knew to look out the window and there he was with his head held a little high taking it all in.
Thank you for sharing Bailey with all of us here on Tripawds. What a sweet, loving boy.
My heart breaks for your loss as it never seems like there is enough time with creatures like this in our lives.
xoxo
Darcy & Bart
I know my time was extraordinary, but you are right I would have loved more time with him. He was the best dog I could have ever asked for. We grew up together and grew old together.
I got chills… my heart aches for your loss and I am so sorry. My girl, Shelby, also had a fracture due to Hemangiosarcoma. Sadly, her cancer didn’t present itself in the initial break but rather 4 months later in her spleen which was removed and we immediately started chemo. But that cancer had been in her for so long. We chose to amputate in January and got the definitive diagnosis of hemangio. She’s almost 2 months post-amp, still getting chemo (we did 5 and decided to add more). She’s going strong but it’s definitely been a rough several months. Bailey’s story definitely inspires me and gives me hope that Shelby will beat those odds as well.
Sending you lots of love and hugs!
Alison and Shelby
PS – I love the poem!
I will pray for Shelby’s continued strength. I don’k know why, but Bailey never had spleen issues. We discussed this with the vet all the time waiting. Nothing in his body ever failed, other than just pure old age. We were told 3-6 months, 9 mos at best with chemo (5 rounds, we only did 2). As you have read those numbers just didn’t matter. Love your dog and that love will give her strength to keep going until it is time. Bailey kissed me right before he fell asleep, I will always think in my heart he knew it was time and was saying his final good bye.
The heartache right now seems unbearable. Yeas the length of time together with Bailey is incredible beyond words……a true miracle on so many levels. But it also means you have that much more to miss.
Right now the void is so strong it’s impossible to feel his presence…impossible to fill that void with all those sacred treasured memories you shared.Slowly, one by one, a happy memory will seep into your thoughts and you will find yourself with a little smile as you delight in all the joys you shared.
You shared a beautiful tribute today and a lovely, lovely poem. You and Bailey have touched us all deeply. I’ve only been on the site about a year, but I’ve gotten to know this sweet boy and the UNBREAKABLE bond you share. NOTHING can dim the bright light Bailey surroundsyou with. And make no mistake aboutit, is presence here did make this world a brighter place.
Bailey lived a life of meaning and purpose and has inspired us…he has inspired everyone who met him. The two of you are soulmates who, together, have impacted us all greatly.
Bailey made his own rules for how he wold live his life AND he did cross-over to the other side of this life on his own terms! He let you know he was ready..no hesitation..no fear…no struggles..just knowing that, while his earthly journey was done, he still has mich more of another journey ahead…and that truly is to be your Guardian Angel.
I love the ages your daighter has…very insightful…and who knows…probably very true! He’s probably make every cloud is very own toy! Talk about great suffies!There is a great image somewhere posted on the site…wish I could tell you where…but I think the title was “Proof dogs go to heaven”. It was a photo of a cloud in the shape of a dog’s head…really nice.
My Bodie, sixteen, passed away around Christmas. I have slept alone since then and I miss him beside me so. Happy Hannah rear leg amp.) cannot get up the stairs and she’s way to big for me to carry. Just recently I bought a samll mattress and put it on the floor downstairs so I can sleep with her…although, she’s taken it over and I end up half on one of her many dog beds. Maybe Prancer can sleep with you. You’ll feel Bailey’s presence soon though…he’s still beside you.
PLEASE continue to post here and share more stories AND more pnotos. We are all family and we love our Bailey! And kow this to be true…BAILEY WILL NEVER BE FORGOTTEN!!!
There’s one thing that would make Bailey’s tail wag right now, and that would be for you to scroll back up and look at the photos where he’s running through the brass so happily and the one where he and Prancer are looking at that crazy orange stuffy…I think he’s growling at it…..yeah, it made you smile just a little through your tears..and Bailey wants you to smile everytime you think of him…that makes his tail wag.
Surrounding you with Bailey’s eternal grace and sending you or love.
Sally and Happy Hannah
Thank you for understanding the loss of having him Bailey next to me for 19 years. People think I am sad because he died, but I am sad because he is not here next to me. My daughter now sings me a song she made up (changes a bit every time) that she calls “Running Free” and sings about all the things Bailey is doing now. She is an amazing kid and, although is sad about Bailey not here, focuses on the wonderful place her is now. I, unfortunately, am a little more selfish still and focus on him not being here. I am trying to learn from her.
Thank you for sharing Brave Bailey with us. I will never forget him.
You were so truly blessed with this wonderful pup…..I can’t even imagine being fortunate enough to have a dog for this long. Bailey was obviously a very loved, and very happy guy, and his life will be truly celebrated. I am going through my own heartbreak as well, my beloved yellow Lab Polly, just lost her battle a week and a half ago to this same cancer, hemangiosarcoma, at 9 1/2 years old. She was just 4 months post amp, and battled for about a year.
My heart is aching terribly for our losses, but also so happy for you to have had your sweet Bailey for almost 20 years…..
Keeping you in my thoughts today…..
Bonnie & Angel Polly
Polly is such a beautiful baby. I am so sorry for your loss too. Thank you for sharing your story with me. I have been so blessed having Bailey for so long and to also still have my 16 1/2 year old baby that we adopted when she was about 7 months old. The thought of losing her now overtakes me as she is in kidney failure, but I never want these wonderful animals that have given us unconditional love to suffer. I have found it takes enormous strength to make the decision and I now admire everyone who does such. My prayers are with you as you recover from the loss of Polly.
My heart broke when I read the news, I am deeply sorry. The profound loss you must be feeling right now is deeper than any words of mine can convey, I wish I could say the right things that would take away the pain of setting Bailey free. I am so, so sorry.
No dog could ever ask for a better life or a more devoted family. What you did for him will repay you a thousand times over as you continue living the spirited, loving and happy life he taught you to lead. What amazing lessons, what life-changing looks into the greatest love on this planet, the love of a dog for his human. I know these things will forever be a part of you, and spread through the universe like magic, all because Bailey taught you how to open your heart and Be More Dog.
Please know we are all thinking of you and while truly saddened by this great loss, we are in awe of the long, beautiful life you shared. I hope that many many more dogs and cats and other animals can experience such true joy while they walk this planet.
{{{{{{hugs}}}}}
I know I have said this before but you all have been a life line for me for 2 years. I never knew I could consider people I never met before as family. My daughter and I refer to you as our Tripawd family, always there to offer a word of support. Thank you for that. Not everyone realizes the bond between our babies and us, but I know you all do. I recognize Bailey is in a better place now, but what some people aren’t understanding is how hard it is not to have him here. My daily routine has changed. I no longer wake up and pick him up to take him out, wait for him to do his business, feed him, give him a treat, check on him throughout the day, give him treats, push the chairs in and pick up shoes so he won’t trip, pick him up to go to bed after we go outside again and so much more. My heart will hurt for a while. Thank you for understanding.
I’m so sorry that it was Bailey’s time to make his journey to Rainbow Bridge. You gave Bailey the most precious gift of love…his angel wings…and for that he will be forever grateful. It is the hardest thing any of us will ever have to do because we are consciously making the decision to take over their pain so they can run free again.
Bailey had such an amazingly long life that most of us can only dream of for our pups, but no matter how long the time (even 19-1/2+ years) is never enough.
Godspeed sweet Bailey. Run free with all of the angel heroes that have gone before you. Please send your mommy pennies so she knows that you arrived safely.
In time may memories of your biy bring you smiles and happiness instead of only tears and sadness. Wishing you strength, peace, and courage until you are all reunited again.
Hugs and chocolate Labby kisses,
Ellen and Charley xoxo
3+ Year OS Warrior…and counting!
I read everyone’s comments when they were posted and cried when I read everyone and I figured I would reply as soon as I can. Well it is one week and as I was reading your comment to reply I didn’t remember reading the pennies comment. I had family in from NY and went to Epcot this weekend. I always let my daughter pick one souvenir. She really thinks about this every time putting a lot of thought into her choice. This time I found a book that you store pressed pennies in…if you have been to Epcot they have them for almost every country. She decided quickly this is what she wanted and we began pressing pennies for the remaining countries. I had no idea how significant this choice was until I re-read you comment about send pennies. I will always think of him now when we place another penny in her book…which she calls her treasures. Little did I know they were treasures.
What an amazing story, and the love you have for him just brought me to tears. We love our pups so much, and their time with us is always too short. From the beginning of his life with you to the end, he was so loved. Like you said, Treasures hard to find. God Bless you for believing in him, and giving him two wonderful more years {{Hugs}}
I always said to my vet my babies are part of the family. Decisions will be made for them with that premise in mind. Thank you for taking the time for reading about my handsome man.
I can’t tell you how sorry I am up hear of Baileys run for the bridge…. I can’t stop the tears as I know exactly how you feel. What I don’t know is how blessed you both were to be bonded for that long!!! How lucky you both were. How we wish we could be as lucky as you!!
What is absolutely awesome is that Bailey kicked cancers butt!!! It was old age that happened and that is what we wAnt for all our furkids… To live to a ripe old age!!!
Good for you Bailey. You did it handsome boy!!! And what a pawty there is going on right now at the Bridge!!
He’ll always be with you… You know that. He’s in your heart and you will feel him when you’re ready. He’s not going anywhere for long as he will always be there!
RIP little man… Run fast and free!!!
Christine…..with Franklin in her heart <3
You gave me a smile when I read your comment. I never thought about him out living cancer. Thank you.
Oh how truly sorry I am. Tears are streaming down my face, God bless you.
Tammy
Thank you for your thoughts
I would like to start out by saying I am truly sorry for your loss. But I would also like to say thank you for your February 26th post. I scheduled my dog’s amputation today and though I felt relieved to have it on the books, I was suddenly overcome with an intense fear and wild emotions. Am I making the right choice? Are we being selfish? Your post helped me to realize that these feelings are normal and that if dogs can make an amputation work in their teens, then we should definitely give my 5 year old girl a shot. Thank you so much!
I am so happy my post helped you. I remember going home after we decided to move forward with the amputation. We had only that day to decide as his femur was broken. I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t see Bailey either for 2 days. They said it was best I didn’t come the next day as he would be drugged and he needed time to heel. Fortunately, there was a great doctor there that called me regularly and kept me up to day. Seeing him was a bit of a shock as he was still pretty drugged up and couldn’t walk well or really do anything. This continued for a few more days at home as I slept with him on the floor. That is when I found this wonderful site and they told me to get him off the pain patch he had been wearing. I immediately called the doctor to do such and he agreed. Within hours Bailey got up, went out the doggie door himself and took his first tinkle on his own. My daughter, who was sleeping with me on the floor, and I were elated. Bailey was back and didn’t seem too troubled by the amputation. Every now and then he would try to lift his back leg that remained when he tinkled but quickly realized that wasn’t going to work. I had two more blessed years with him and wouldn’t change my decision again if I could go back. Please let me know how your little girl does, you all will be in our prayers.